chiefbigfaith

HAPPY FATHERS DAY !

 

Pastor Kok III's Sunday Message: Happy Father's Day to all the Great Fathers of Our Country and Around the World, and Especially to the Greatest Dad of them All, Jim Kok! How Our Relationship with Our Human Father Sometimes Effects Our Relationship with the Heavenly Father. The Importance of "Depth."

 

 

Preface to Worship: For those of you new to the Sunday Morning Message, I am Pastor Kok III, Founder of Mustard Seed Ministries, and every Sunday I transmit a Spiritual Message by e-mail to people around the nation and around the world. This message is also posted at www.myspace.com, search Jesusnow2005@yahoo.com

 

(MSM does not endorse MySpace or its advertisements, or other spaces, we just use the space to tell the Good News) as well as on Mustard Seed Ministries own website at www.mustardseedfaith.org/TodaysWorshipService.

 

 

Notice: Last week's message was published at www.mustardseedfaith.org/TodaysWorshipServicebut due to recurring technical difficulties it may not be published again, although I am hoping it will be)

 

And thank you to all of those who responded to last weeks message. I really appreciate the communication and feedback and hope to continue hearing from you even if I don't always personally reply to your response.

 

Good Morning, It's Great to be in Bellflower, California on June 18, 2006 at 6:35 a.m (pst) outside Bethany CRC, composing today's Sunday Morning Spiritual Message. This is the first time I've composed from Bellflower, CA, but Bellflower has historical relevance for me and my message and for those who are from the Reformed tradition, which I will explain. But first, let's sing a song:

 

Song: Redeemed

 

http://newsongonline.org/nsomid/hymns/REDEEMED.MID

 

And we are indeed redeemed my friends if we believe in Jesus Christ as Savior. Praise His Name on High! And another song:

 

Song: Sweet Hour of Prayer

 

http://newsongonline.org/nsomid/hymns/SW-HR-PR.MID

 

And this is a sweet hour of prayer, worship, and the morning message---all for the Glory of God! Let us pray:

 

Prayer: Dear Heavenly Father, we come to you --some of us with hearts heavy because of the loss of a loved one or a disappointment or a tragedy in the family, or whatever it may be; others of us come to you  with hearts of joy having enjoyed the success of something--a new accomplishment, a new relationship, whatever it may be. And so both heavy hearts and hearts of joy are gathered together today and we pray that you be with both of them and every other person in whatever state of mind and being they are in right now. And I ask you Lord to give me the words to say today--give me the thoughts to think and the feelings to feel so that I can deliver a meaningful message here on Fathers' Day from Bellflower, California. Bless this message, Jesus. Amen.

 

Let's sing another song:

 

Song: Heavenly Sunlight http://newsongonline.org/nsomid/hymns/HEAVENLY.MID

 

And although the sun has not broken through the haze here in southern California yet, wherever you are, maybe in Michigan or Texas or New York or the Philippines,  I hope the "sunlight" of heaven is shining down upon you and in you. Let the love of Jesus Christ warm you from within.

 

Well, here I am in Bellflower, and yesterday evening (Saturday) I drove around Bellflower and took pictures of important Bellflower points of interest, especially those that are connected to the Dutch-American tradition in this city, and the Reformed Church. I've made reference to Bellflower in previous messages and there are a few pages dedicated to Bellflower on my website (see  http://www.mustardseedfaith.org/BellflowerPage.html    and

 

http://www.mustardseedfaith.org/Bellflower2Page.html and

 

http://www.mustardseedfaith.org/BellflowerHistoryPage.html )

 

And I found a new  Bellflower history page on the web at  http://www.bellflower.org/home/index.asp?page=221

 

And while looking up Bellflower information on the web I found out that a few motion pictures have used parts of Bellflower in their movies, including, apparently, the movie  "Pearl Harbor"  as well as "The Island" which filmed at  the Bellflower Aquatic Center  at Thompson Park  according to http://www.bellflower.org/home/index.asp?page=227

 

 And when I speak of Bellflower today, I will also make reference to Artesia and Cerritos, two nearby communities which together make up what they call the ABC community (Artesia, Bellflower, & Cerritos). There is also nearby Lakewood.

 

And in Artesia the most recent addition to the community is the "East West Ice Palace" founded and apparently owned or supported by Michelle Kwan the former world class ice skater.   (see http://www.artesiaicepalace.com/news/grand-opening/opening.html and see http://www.artesiaicepalace.com/info.html;also see attached photo)

 

But before I go any further, let's begin with Scripture. I am including several "father" passages which I will make reference to in the message:

 

Scripture: Matthew 15: 3-7; Matthew 19:19; Luke 11: 10-13; Luke 15:20; Ephesians 6:4

 

 

"And why do you break the command of God for the sake of your tradition?  For God said, 'Honor your father and mother' and 'Anyone who curses his father or mother must be put to death.'   But you say that if a man says to his father or mother, 'Whatever help you might otherwise have received from me is a gift devoted to God,' 6he is not to 'honor his father' with it. Thus you nullify the word of God for the sake of your tradition. Matt 15:3-7

 

'Honor your father and your mother,' and, 'You shall love your neighbor as yourself.'  Matt 19:19

 

 

 For everyone who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened.   If a son asks for bread from any father among you, will he give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will he give him a serpent instead of a fish?   Or if he asks for an egg, will he offer him a scorpion?...how much more will your heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to those who ask Him!"  Luke 11:10-13

 

 

 "And he arose and came to his father . But when he was still a great way off, his father saw him and had compassion, and ran and fell on his neck and kissed him.Luke 15:20

 

 Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord. Eph 6:4

 

[I'll try again. My computer just froze up and I lost a large chunk of what I just composed]

 

First, in regards to Matthew 15:3-7 a commentary says the following: 

 

To dedicate property to God is indeed lawful and laudable, but not at the expense of filial duty.Thus have ye made the commandment of God of none effect, [eekuroosate] - 'cancelled' or 'nullified' it-by your tradition.
(from Jamieson, Fausset, and Brown Commentary, Electronic Database. Copyright © 1997, 2003 by Biblesoft, Inc. All rights reserved.)

 

Apparently, some believers were using their donations to the church  or synagogue as an excuse to not honor their parents --to not help them financially.This was a transparent excuse which Jesus addressed saying it was not valid.

 

Next, Matthew 19:19 speaks for itself. We honor our parents--we give them respect and  a position of honor in the family. This is, obviously, in general, and does not necessarily include all the various exceptions in which dysfunction creates problems. If parents of fathers are being abusive then children must "honor" them by somehow assertively addressing the problem, maybe with the help of others (depending upon age).

 

The next two passages speak more of the love of the father for the son than vice-versa but are relevant. 

 

Luke 11: 10-13 indicates the overwhelming trust a child can have for a parent, knowing without a doubt that the father will provide. Haven't we all experienced that total trust in our youth? We believed our parents were infallible--that they were "almighty"--they were always there, providing for us. Similarly, many children have that same sort of trust and confidence in their teachers. And the final sentence of this passage indicates an analogy to the trust we can place in the Heavenly Father knowing He will provide with the Power of the Holy Spirit!

 

Luke 15: 20 is one verse in the passage better known as the story of the "Prodigal Son."In this story the son goes off and wastes his inheritance and several years of his life doing nothing constructive. Finally, with no alternatives, he decides to return home wondering if the father will allow him to come back. HE is surprised to find that the father is overwhelmed with joy to have the son back. It is analogical to the grace of God and the love of the Heavenly Father for us, despite our wanderings and lack of faithfulness. If we come back to Him with total trust He will not only provide but He is like a shepherd finding a lost sheep--nothing could make Him happier!

 

Finally, Ephesians 6:4 speaks of the father's (or parents) duty to not "exasperate" the child. Don't take the child for granted. Respect the child. Don't treat him like the "boy" forever or even when he is young. Give him [or her ]  respect. Cherish the kids. And they will do likewise to you.

 

Although this is "Fathers Day" the message could be for either Mothers or Fathers Day, albeit there is a distinct difference between the relationship of the father and the son as opposed to the mother and the son.  The son expects different things from the father than the mother. And the bonding experience is different. And there's no formula for how it comes about, nor a definition for what is right.

 

For some sons and fathers the relationship develops with a bat and a baseball(my dad was the co-coach for my younger brother, Steve's, t-ball baseball team) For others sons and fathers maybe its a chess board(my grandfather Leo Peters loved to play chess and played with his son, Mark, as well as my older brother, Andrew). Still others--its going to a movie. I remember growing up in Grand Rapids, MI,  Richard Mouw (now the president of Fuller Seminary) always took his son Dirk (who was one year older than me and went to the same church and high school) to a movie once a week.

 

And there's a variety of other ways to bond. I know Steve Brinks, a friend of mine from Calvin College, grew up going fishing with his father, Raymond( a CRC missionary who was in Argentina and Dominican Republic for many years) , and became somewhat competitive about it. 

 

Another friend of mine, Jack Holwerda Jr, apparently at one point in time bought a remote control airplane with his dad and intended on flying it around  together (although for some reason I don't think they ever got it to work) .

 

Some sons bond with the father whether they like it or not--a friend of mine, Keith Steensma, and all his siblings, were in their dad's math class at Millbrook Christian Junior High. Mr. Steensma was a tough math teacher (but good) and his kids were the best in math (the oldest son, Daryl, has a PhD in Chemistry and a law degree and last thing I heard he was practicing law in San Diego, CA).

 

I personally experienced different things with my own earthly father. There was no one thing that we regularly did together and since I had three siblings (two brothers, one sister) it was oftenin conjunction with them and also often with our cousins (one son, Brian, and one daughter, Audra,  of Gary Kok, my dad's youngest brother). Whether it was going to cut  down a Christmas Tree in December in West Michigan, or fishing a few times, or playing basketball in the driveway at our home at 1020 Griswold, or going with him to Pine Rest Hospital on Sundays (where he worked as a chaplain); or going to the cottage on Lake MIchigan; you name it --there were a variety of experiences; some good, some not so good.

 

I tended to clash, occassionally, with my dad, Jim Kok, who is now a pastor at the Crystal Cathedral in Garden Grove, CA. I did not always agree with his judgment or decision-making process. We butted heads a few times (not literally but almost). But most of the time my siblings and myself were pretty good kids, going to school, staying out of trouble, helping out around the house, etc.

 

I shovelled the snow more than anybody else--I'm not sure why. My two brothers were just as capable but for some reason I was the only one who ever did the job. I also had a paper route unlike my two brothers.  But in general we honored our parents and respected our father, and still do; even if we disagree about certain things.

 

Then, in 1984, as some of you know, we moved from west Michigan to Bellflower, CA.And I've already made reference above  to some points of interest in Bellflower.  Why did we move to Bellflower of all places? Why not Bel Air? Or Bell Gardens? Or any other of the various cities surrounding Los Angeles?

 

The primary reason was that my dad knew Bellflower because he had lived here through 6th or 7th grade. His dad, the Rev. Gareth Kok, had come here in 1936 and was the pastor at 1st CRC (see attached picture) and was the founder of the Valley Christian Schools (see attached).

 

But CRC (Christian Reformed Church ) pastors rarely stayed at one church their entire career and Gareth Kok (my late grandfather) also served in Hanford, CA, as well as Holland, MI and Hills, MN; among other places. So my dad also lived in Holland MI in junior high and high school.

 

When my grandfather first came to Bellflower this was a farm community, mostly dairy farms. But they also grew different crops including apples apparently. There is an old apple sign  (apparently resurrected rather than the original) near the intersection of Beach & Bellflower Blvd which goes back to the days of "Belle Fleur" apples(see attached pictures). 

 

And  many of the dairy farmers who came here were Dutch-Americans. They still spoke Dutch and very little English. My grandfather spoke both Dutch & English  well enough so that they would come to him for help as well as listen to him preach in Dutch at 1st CRC (see attached pictures). Later on, my grandfather retired in Bellflower (see attached "9936 Arkansas St") and attended Bethany CRC (see attached) where Dale Vanderveen was pastor for several years (but is now in Hudsonville, MI) .

 

IN 1984 when we came here I knew very little, if anything, about Bellflower. I only stayed for a few months before deciding to return to west Michigan and complete my final year of high school where I started (Grand Rapids Christian High).

 

Today, Jim & Linda Kok, still live on Chicago Ave in Bellflower, and I just visited them a few days ago (see attached "Jim", "Linda", and "Jim & Linda" ). NOt far from where they live is Caruthers Parkwhere I played basketball and tennis periodically with my younger brother or anybody else interested in playing. I mentioned Valley Christian High and the Middle School ---and not far from there is a CRC Ministry Center(at 10358 Artesia Blvd, see attached). Also on Artesia Blvd is Heritage Photographywhere we had a family picture taken once (at 9958 Artesia BLvd, see attached).

 

In and around Bellflower are several Christian Reformed Churches in addition to 1st CRC and Bethany CRC; including Rosewood CRC with pastor Dan Brinks (see attached) as well as Trinity CRC in Artesia just down the street from where an acquaintance of mine, Kara Hoeksema, grew up (see attached). And there's another CRC not far from there, as well as a Netherland Reformed Church--which is  part of a separate denomination and they may still preach in Dutch there--or at least did so for much longer than any of the Christian Reformed or Reformed Churches). Not far from there on Roseton is the family home (see attached photo) of a friend I met when we came to Bellflower in 1984--by the name ofKirk Templeman. I'm not sure what he is doing today, but he was a nice kid .

 

Other indications of the Dutch presence in Bellflower is the Holland-American Store  (see attached) also on Artesia Blvd across from the CRC Ministry Center , and there's the Artesia Christian Home  (see attached) where my grandfather spent the last year of his life.

 

Indications of Bellflower formerly being an agricultural area, as well as currently an "equestrian" area is the Feed Shop at  10145 Woodruff. Another landmark that has nothing to do with the Dutch or agriculture in Bellflower is the Bagel Shop at 17025 Bellflower Blvd.It has a giant donut sign having formerly been a donut shop (see attached) and I remember it particularly because it was just one block away from my grandfather's house and one of the first things I saw when we came here as children to visit Grandma & Grandpa . It's so big you can't miss it.

 

There's not a lot of cultural things to do in Bellflower, although they apparently do have an active theatre group as well as the Bellflower Symphony Orchestra. The only museum that I know of is called the Carpenter Museumand is on the grounds of Caruthers Park and is barely more than a tiny house and the open hours are so slim it is hard to get in (I still have not been inside). It is also referred to as the Bellflower Heritage Society if I recall correctly (see attached photo).

 

And also close to my parents home on Chicago Ave  is the Joel & Leah Slenk home on View Park, almost directly behind my parents house (but on the opposite side of the street). Joel Slenk came from Grand Rapids and Calvin College around 1988 and has been here ever since. He works for Boeing today. His dad, Howard, was a music professor at Calvin College and conducted the "Messiah" every Christmas in downtown Grand Rapids. Briefly after college when I was in Bellflower I socialized with Joel Slenk and a few others from Bethany CRC in a group called "Koinonia"--for young adults.

 

This included Jim Tanis, John Kortenhoven, the late Jim Zoetewey, Doug Boerigter and his sister, Judy all of whom went to Calvin College at least briefly,  and one of the daughters of the pastor at Bethany CRC at the time,  Hal Wiersma; among several others.

 

And also near my parents home is theSan Gabriel River--which is a concrete riverbed (see attached photo). People walk, ride bikes, skateboard, and ride horses along the river. When it rains significantly the riverbed can fill up almost to the top, which is a lot of water. And it all runs straight to the Pacific Ocean, emptying at Seal Beach. You can ride your bike all the way to Seal Beach along the riverbed (I did it once).

 

And this is context for the message today. This is Bellflower, CA. When we came here in '84 I barely knew how to get from our house on Chicago Ave to the freeway. The freeways were so fast and large it was a whole new experience for me at the time. I worked at UPS for a summer later on and still later I worked at Knotts Berry Farm for a summer (in Buena Park).

 

Friends from Grand Rapids came to visit, including Jack Holwerda Jr. , Keith Steensma(the only pictures I have of Jack & Keith are at Yosemite see http://www.mustardseedfaith.org/YosemitePage.html ) and Doug Kosters (a good picture of myself, Jack Holwerda, and Doug Kosters in the backyard at Chicago Ave can be seen at http://www.mustardseedfaith.org/DougPage.html 

 

Ironically, the impression of visitors from west Michigan to Bellflower is not always instantly positive, given their first impression and expectation they have from watching or glancing at the Hour of Power Worship Service at the Crystal Cathedral which has been aired every Sunday on television for the last 50 years. Because the Crystal Cathedral is part of the Reformed denomination ( a sister of the Christian Reformed denomination) many people from Grand Rapids know or know of the Crystal Cathedral and the Hour of Power.

 

And on TV, of course, the  overall impression is sun, flowers, perfect weather, glorifying God--and nearby Disneyland and Angel Stadium.But just as if you personally come to Garden Grove or personally  come to Bellflower and just drive around you will see a lot of apartments, liquor stores, a multitude of "mom and pop" shops, automotive repair, all the various fastfood restaurants and gigantic department stores, etc--not all of which is perfectly beautiful and pleasing to the eye. You might see some homeless people (especially by the San Gabriel River as well as near the freeway exits hoping for a handout).

 

Also, those who know my extended family  from Grand Rapids know that my mom's late father, Leo Peters, lived in the largest house (at the time) in East Grand Rapids, growing up (at 750 Plymouth for those of you from Grand Rapids), and may have some expectations "by association" in coming to visit the Kok family in Bellflower.

 

Unfortunately, for those with high expectations, Bellfloweris not a fancy city. Nor is it near Beverly Hills, Bel-Air, the Hollywood Sign, or any of the entertainment areas. Although as mentioned above apparently at least a few segments from major motion pictures have been filmed in Bellflower, including a part from "Taxi" which was, of course, a Paul Schrader film (and I think, if I recall correctly, that he may have shot a scene for "Hard Core" in Bellflower as well. The title of the film suggests something more than it was).

 

For those who do not know, Paul Schrader came from Grand Rapids and the Christian Reformed tradition(he also attended Grand Rapids Christian High) and went on to write, produce, or direct a variety of movies, including the two mentioned above which have more direct Calvinist themes than his later films. " Hard Core"  is about a gal from a Young Calvinist group (a part of the Christian Reformed Church tradition) , who  goes astray in Hollywood. Schrader filmed parts of it in Grand Rapids.

 

But as I was saying, for those who come to visit Bellflower, such as my two friends Jack & Keith, with high expectations, they tend to be disappointed. My parents home on Chicago Ave is an average home with four bedrooms, a normal middle-class backyard--nothing fancy, but nothing to be ashamed of.

 

 On paper, it is worth more than an average midwest home just because of the location (i.e. southern California). And since coming here in 1984--when there was only a pink house with horses next to our home on Chicago Ave--several large homes have been built in place of the "old pink house".

 

It is now 9:25 a.m on Sunday, June 18, 2006 and I am sitting here in my car right next to Bethany CRC watching dutiful parishioners arrive for worship service. I myself attended Bethany CRC for a while when Hal Wiersma was the pastor.

 

As I was saying, Jack & Keith may have been disappointed with Bellflower (i.e. "Here I am, entertain me" ) although I did my best to entertain them and took them to the Tonight Show with Johnny Carson (the show we attended included the judge from 'Night Court' --remember that?)  as well as up north to Yosemite, among other things.

 

And when Jack came separately with Doug (Jack's  second time to Bellflower) we went out on our boat to Long Beach Harbor and went to Tiajuana(a Mexican border town across from San Diego)  among other things, culminating  in driving the car of  the late Rev.  Herman "Bud" Ridder  ( a pastor at the Crystal Cathedral at the time) back to Grand Rapids for his daughter (to whom he apparently was giving the car).

 

One thing Jack & Keith (& Doug) did not see was the Crystal Cathedral itself. They did not see my dad's office or the glass church,  or the view from the top floor of Catalina Island, Disneyland, and Angel Stadium, among other things. So they went back to Grand Rapids and talked to their friends (some of our mutual friends) and gave a description that was very much myopic and lacking in depth. There's no way you can generalize Bellflower or southern California or the Crystal Cathedral or the entertainment industry, etc after only being here for a week, or less.

 

I've been coming and going since 1984 and still see new things and experience new people and things every day. That's because I explore.  And I evangelize along the way.

 

And I tell you this my friends for the sake of context. I mentioned the importance of the relationship of the son to the father and how that sometimes affects the relationship of a person with God. Somebody wrote a book about that topic (can't name it at the moment off the top of my head), but I can attest to it, in general .  I've seen my mom's relationship (or lack of) with her late father, and  how that effects her opinion and view of the church as well as her own walk with God. I think there could be more depth in her spiritual walk--and I pray for it (although I should note that she supports the church and her husband as a pastor but definitely is a little "jaded" in some regards).

 

Even my dad, a pastor, I wonder about his relationship with his father and how that has had an impact on his pastoral career. The early death of his mother may have also had an impact. Depth is needed. Depth of relationship with our parents may impact the depth of our relationship with our heavenly father. 

 

By analogy, Jack & Keith's visit to southern California lacked depth,and therefore their entire perception of southern California, and Bellflower, etc. is limited by the lack of depth of their visit.  As long as they stay in Grand Rapids they will tell a story to others that "amputates" the more complete details of this area and the people. And they are not alone. My brother-in-law, Kevin Anderson, may tend to superficially stereotype people "from California"

 

Paul Schrader's experience growing up in the Christian Reformed Church in Grand Rapids apparently was not entirely positive and that experience was reflected in some of his early films, in which he lampoons Dutch Calvinism. Unfortunately, Schrader did not get a lot of "depth" in his church experience growing up and therefore his relationship to the church and the Body of Christ may lack depth to this day (unless he intentionally works on creating depth).

 

Bad experiences can be overcome but it requires work. It's a decision as to whether one wants to repair the breach or whether one wants to become superficial. Some choose the latter while lamenting the bad experience as a youth, not willing to make the work to overcome it.

 

Even if you had a bad relationship with a parent or parents you can still grow in Christ. But it takes work. You have to decide whether it is worth it.

 

When I tell you about Bellflower, I try to include some history and pictures so that you will get to know a little bit about it in depth, but undoubtedly you could find much more to discuss and read about. You could look are more of my web pages, including some of the Jim pages (i.e.  http://www.mustardseedfaith.org/JimsKidPage.html)or one of the Grandpa Kok pages (i.e.

http://www.mustardseedfaith.org/GrandpaKokPage.html or

 

http://www.mustardseedfaith.org/GrandpaKokFamilyPage.html )

 

The way we treat other people is impacted by our relationship with God and vice-versa. The more we know and understand, the more depth we have in our relationships and the more meaningful these relationships become. Trust God and take the steps required to make your relationships more significant.

 

Let's sing another song.

 

Song: The Comforter Has Come

http://newsongonline.org/nsomid/hymns/COMFORTR.MID

 

God will carry you through tough times. In fact, tough times are sometimes a sign of growth, even if we don't appreciate it always. Don't acquiesce to stereotypes and broad generalizations. Get to know people and the setting, truly so--not just superficially. And you will experience a new plateau in living the life of faith. Guaranteed.  Let's sing one more song.

 

Song: "I've Got a Mansion"

http://newsongonline.org/nsomid/hymns/MANSION.MID

 

I don't have a literal mansion, my friends. I don't own my later grandfather Peters house/mansion, nor do my parents live in a mansion on Chicago Ave in Bellflower, and what I live in is even more humble; but I still feel as if I am living in a "mansion" much better and larger than any brick or wood or glass building.  I have the Kingdom of God wherever I go--whether I am in Garden Grove, Bellflower, Pasadena, Grand Rapids, or anywhere else!

 

Prayer:Dear God, It's 10:00 a.m. and that's my message for this morning. I have composed for three or more hours now and I will be sending this message around the country and world in the next few hours. It will be posted at various sites and I hope it will be a blessing to others. Bless this message, Lord. Give it Your stamp of approval and let others learn from it and be edified by it.  Lord thank You for giving me the means and education and experience to do what I am doing for You--for the Kingdom--and if it is Your will, let it continue to be so. Amen.

 

IF YOU NEED HELP CONTACT ME AT PASTORKOK3@YAHOO.COM AND WRITE “NEED HELP, CHIEF” IN THE SUBJECT LINE  

 

Sincerely

 

J.P. Kok

Pastor Kok III

Mustard Seed Ministries