gettingthefear

im not here anymore
im starting to think i never was at all
these feelings will never be imperishable
ive tried so hard for all of you
you, so preoccupied with the loudness of your mind
its all plastered to the backround
right back around twice repeating but always feeling new
lean forward, smile hard, you never heal.
im waiting for it, just waiting
i'd say im being rather patient, you know?
its been years, more than i can even count
that wind of change to ring the chime
and it will be ok.


im not fooling myself.
you must know i do know
the situation completely asessed
reality already measure in full
i know what hole sits in the ground before me
its just more fun this way.
im sure the fall will be just painful enough...