Mangroovie

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Abuses

As noted before this is a topic highly controversial. Something can be considered as offensive and abusive for some people and a high praise for others. In every day life not much rude language is heard. If you are able to hear it from sober mouth, consider yourself very lucky. You have just received a high honour, you are assumed as an close friend. Only Inanimate objects and friends receive the truly imaginative way of flushing the brain from frustration and anger in Finland.

If you are not close to a Finn you have to practice your eyes to perceive annoyance or anger. Clenched jaw, pulsating vein is all you may see, and of course something getting chopped into pieces with the closest bladed or blunt weapon in a ferocity that would make any gory film seem lame.


=~ Means English counterpart
== Means word to word translation

We are great fans of smelling things:
Haista paska/vittu/kusi/sonta!
== Smell shit/cunt/piss/bile!
~= Go fuck yourself

Seems that our ancestors did much of that trial and error -stuff before they noticed that hats were best for keeping the head warm:
(Kusi/Paska/Vittu/Muna/Vesi)pää
== (piss/shit/cunt/cock/water)head
~= Fuck-head, Fuck-face

The theme of leaving runs deep in our culture:
Mene or Mee/Suksi/Painu/Hipsi/Häivy/Juokse/Syöksy
== Go to/Ski to/Take off/Prance off/Vanish to/Run to/Rush to

Good destinations for the trip you wish him/her to take:
Helvettin/Vittuun/Kuuseen/Perseeseen/Järveen/Suohon/Seinään/Kaivoon/Avantoon
== Hell/Cunt/Fir/Arse/Lake/Swamp/Wall/Well/Hole in the ice

A little more precicion and the whole farewell wishes can be uttered:
Suksi hevon vittuun!
== Ski to horses cunt
Häivy helevetin kuuseen!
== Vanish to hells Fir

Both having the meaning ~= Fuck off, Beat off

Somebody drooling into your drink trying to get too close to you (If somebody is going to drool into your drink it should be you!)
Älä lääpi! Painu/Mene/Mee vituun kuolaamasta siitä!
=~ Watch your hands! Fuck off from drooling on me!
== Don't paw (sleazily)! Take off/Go to cunt from drooling on me!

Something more elaborate:
Saatanan kääpiö, tuollaset pitäis vittu tunkea takaisin rukkaseen ja nussia uudelleen, Helevetin keskonen, tuollaset meillä talutetaan navetan taakse ja sotketaan suohon...Niin perkele. Saatanan sikiö! Vittu mikä hihhuli! Tule suoraan aukomaan päätäsi jos uskallat vitun tuhkamuna. Tuommonen helevetin riisitautinen narukulli, tyhyjää pullistelet siinä vitun homo! revi se pää perseestäsi ja tule tänne senkin juovapersesika! Vittu lakanaan sinut olis pitäny pyyhkiä kun on näköjään lurahtanut noin paljon kusta sekaan kun sinut siitettiin, perkele! Muijas huoraa kylillä ja sinä munaton aisankannattaja revit nupin turvoksiin ja juokset metrinen kyrpä ottassa kerjäämässä verta nenästäsi. Haita vittu ja maksa velekas! Sinä oksetat minua! Vedä käteen, saatanan apina!

Wow! Sounds like the kinder garden lunch call, doesn't it?
And the translation:
~= You fucking dwarf, likes of you should be fucking stuffed back to the cunt and be fucked again, you fucking still-born, likes of you we walk behind the barn and shovel into swamp...so dammit! Fucking foetus! Jesus, what a freak! Come straight to me yapping your mouth if you dare you fucking impotent. You damn undernourished wire-cock, it's useless to try to puff there you fucking homo! Rip that head out of your arse and come here you streaked-ass pig! Fuck! You should have been wiped into sheets when conceiving you. That much piss was dribbled into the mixture, dammit! Your wife whores around and you gutless cuckold drink yourself senseless and run amok around trying to pick a fight. Fuck you and pay your debts! You make me puke! Go Fuck yourself you fucking ape!

Some snippets taken and explained:
...rukkaseen (rukkanen)
== into the glove, glove
...keskonen
== premature child
... hihhuli
== weirdo,freak
... tule aukomaan päätäsi (aukoa päätä)
== come to open your head (to open ones head)
~= to cuss, yap, whine or fuck with somebody
...tuhkamuna
== ash-balled
~= impotent
... riisitautinen (riisitauti)
== sick with Osteomalacia (Osteomalacia)
~= weak, denourished
... narukulli
== rope-dick, wire-cock,
~= poorly equipped or without potency
...juokset metrinen kyrpä ottassa/otsassa (kyrpä otsassa), (kyrpä-otsa)
== run with a 3-foot cock on your forehead (cock on forehead) (cock-forehead)
~= to be overly stessed,angly and easily provoked (fuckhead, dickhead)
...kerjäämässä verta nenästäsi (kerjätä verta nenästä)
== begging the blood out of the nose (to beg the blood out of the nose)
~= asking for a fight, being ass-kicked
... vedä käteen (vedä kinttaseen/rukkaseen/kouraan/käteen)
== pull in to your glove (pull into your (glove/glove/fist/hand)
~= go fuck yourself, go jerk-off

I hope this gets you going. In fact you might notice that starting with more elaborate abuses might actually break a lot of ice when spoken to Finns with a wide smile. It sort of plays the true tune in our souls